26 April 2006

Poltergeist Spring Cleaning

Things are starting to move here. Furniture is coming and going and stuff is coming out of closets and other stuff is going to the garage. It's spring cleaning time. Yay!

I think I have a great master plan but I haven't written it out yet. So for the fans of the tedious writings of obsessive-compulsive, clinically depressed persons with memory loss and other disorders, this is for you.

The problem is we need more storage space AND we need to put what space we do have to better use. So the first objective is to create more storage space. The only place where this is possible is the garage. Recently I got rid of a bunch of unnecessary junk and then got busy trying to plan for new shelves.

My first attempt didn't work out so good. I put together the double wide shelves I had at my last apartment and then drove the car in for the night. Well, I couldn't open the car door. So I had to get out the power drill, disassemble most of it, put it back together as a single unit and try again. That was a lot of wasted time. And yes, thank you, I DID measure first. Just drop it.

Tonight I finished adding shelves to the wall. It only took - two trips to IKEA, -three trips to Home Depot and a lot of measuring, calculating, drilling, cussing, sweating and improvising.

So, tomorrow the poltergeist begins. The camping equipment we extracted tonight (from under the stairs behind the coat closet on the main floor) will move into the garage. The Christmas decorations and etcetera will move from the walk-in closet in the little bedroom (#3) upstairs to the "room under the stairs."

Then, I can move my clothes into the walk-in closet of bedroom #3 from my current bedroom (#2). The closet in bedroom #2 will become storage for things currently in #3 that don't go to the garage or under the stairs. Eventually I will make #3 my actual bedroom leaving #2 as a library, office, computer room, exercise room, den - - whatever.

The funny thing is, nothing is going to happen in bedroom #1. Nothing's going in and nothing's coming out. There is a storage closet outside bedroom #1 just off the deck but it's full of Halloween decorations. Since we only use that stuff once a year, they may as well just stay there. And beneath the deck there's another storage room/hot water heater room just off the patio. It's full of potting soil, planters and a charcoal grill that may never get used again. So that's off to the garage as well.

The thing that put this all in motion was the purchase of a new dining room table and chairs, replacing the one Brad brought from his previous apartment. The new one is much larger and will require the original one to be moved into the kitchen which will, in turn, cause the one in the kitchen to go bye bye in some manner. I think the latest method will be to turn a few screws, put the pieces in the garage and deal with it later.

There is an urgency to all this. The new table and chairs arrived last night about two weeks ahead of schedule. We weren't ready. I had just finished moving the old computer desk down from the bedroom #3 closet to the dining room in preparation for transit to Brad's niece in San Lorenzo. So now the main floor, consisting of two basic rooms, the kitchen and the dining room/living room, is totally cluttered. In these two rooms we currently have two sofas, three dining tables, 12 chairs, a computer desk, two display cabinets, two CD cabinets, a huge TV, an armchair, a recliner, two lamps and lamp tables, a coffee table and a few odds and ends. And after watching The Amazing Race we emptied the contents of the room under the stairs so in addition to everything else, we have two tents, a gazebo, three camping chairs, two coolers, two cots, various lanterns, sleeping bags, and other equipment waiting to move to the garage.

And when all this is done I promise the car WILL FIT comfortably into the garage once again. Something tells me that I may be given a "poltergeist" job in the next life.

Leapin' Lemur


Earth Day 2006 is over now but I have something to remember this day at the Oakland Zoo from every other day.

Our "Holy Docent Goddess" (the boss) send out an email the following day with a summary of what happened:

· Kudos to Jim Webb: While working at the bat exhibit, he noticed that one of our lemurs apparently decided it was time to look for greener pastures and leaped out of the lemur exhibit! While the keepers prepared for a recapture, Cassady Hudson and Janet Nakao cleared the lemur deck. Jim (and probably others I don’t know about) dashed to help keep the crowds away while the errant lemur was enticed back into its enclosure. Good work!!!

Earlier in the day I was at the lemur observation deck taking some video of my new favorite animals moving about in their huge, new exhibit. The lemur and Malayan/Island fruit bat exhibits are next door to each other and even though I managed to get some cute footage of a lemur actually leaping, I wasn't able to catch them going bananas when the bats were flying around.

One of the things docents absolutely must have is a radio that works properly. Just like when I worked at the airport, maintaining two-way radio contact is essential. I had no idea that I would actually witness an animal out of exhibit but knew shortly after getting to my first assignment that my radio wasn't broadcasting so instead of just dismissing it, I did the right thing and had another one delivered to me at the bat exhibit.

In the afternoon, as the temperature dropped like bat guano and my arms and face got colder and the bats became less active, I noticed something odd in my peripheral field of view. There were lemurs on the fence looking toward the bats. Earlier in the day when that happened it was because the bats were flying around. But the bats were, by now, mostly inside the night house or, if outside, hanging motionless all wrapped up in their wings. And then I realized that I was seeing the backside of one of the lemurs on the fence which couldn't be possible unless he was on the WRONG side of the fence.

For a minute I didn't want to believe that I was seeing an escaped animal. Several months ago I thought I saw an escaped golden weaver bird hanging out above the baboons and spider monkeys. It turned out to be a plain old native bird of some kind that I had never seen before. I felt a little stupid.

But on Sunday, it became clear that we had a problem. I called in the situation and stayed on scene, as trained, reporting on his movements. Soon several keepers arrived and enticed him back inside with some yummy grapes.

It wasn't like the lemur was really trying to escape. Once he was out it was clear from his movements that he was trying to get back in. That's where his family is; that's where his food is and that's the environment he's comfortable with. He almost seemed panicked that he couldn't find a way back in. Now I can't explain this because I don't know how he got out. And I didn't witness his recapture since I was maintaining crowd control.

Since opening, the lemurs have had several escapes and each time exhibit modifications have been made. This is a brand new part of the zoo, open less than a year, and it took the little critters a long time to venture away from the nighthouse into their big new habitat. It's so nice to see them out and enjoying all of it. They're a little like cats, in some ways, and while our escapee was trying to get back in I sort of laughed a bit thinking of my cat, Pewter, who also recently escaped from his habitat for a minute, got a little wet from the rain and ran back to the door crying to get in.

Yup. This is where the food is. This is where the family is. I won't be making any modifications to the house to keep him from making another escape. I just have to hope that he's as smart as our lemurs.

***30 April Update: Silly video now playing at Vimeo.com: http://www.vimeo.com/clip:68299

20 April 2006

Mom's Suggested Blog Topics

Not long ago my mom sent a list of things I could write about. I quickly read the list and then assigned my subconscious to work on it for a while.

I thought she'd mention the incident in the Hong Kong airport when I wandered off to watch planes from the observation deck but she didn't. She thought I'd disappeared but, of course, I knew when to come back to the gate and was never lost but I was only about 14 years old and to her I was missing and presumed gone for good. I was really embarrassed that she had become so frantic but also sorry that I had made her worry. Of course I never told her about the last part. I was too proud to admit that I was ever in any jeopardy of getting lost or abducted. These days, though, I would NEVER let a kid that age wander away in a foreign airport or even Safeway for that matter. It's a good thing I don't have kids. I'd smother them before they ever had a chance of leaving the nest.

One of the things she mentioned which left me befuddled was, and I quote, "suggesting maternity treatment when mother mashed her finger when the safe lid fell on it cause that's all the first aid you knew." I have no idea what that is all about. I've asked her to explain. What did I do, Mom, boil water and put your feet in stirrups?

Here's the rest of the list with my comments:

Broken thong in (East)China Sea, dodging sea urchins.
She's referring to my flip-flops, not my swim suit, that broke leaving me far from shore without protection against those spiny sea creatures and sharp coral.

Natives running for the little plane on that dumb little island.
That was on the Ishigaki trip. When they began boarding the plane, people went nuts and ran under the plane, between the propellers and jostled each other on the stairs just to get on board. I witnessed scenes like that watching the evacuation of Saigon on TV. We never learned what the cause of the bedlam was. Didn't I mention this already? I meant to.

Cockroach running up your pajama leg.
Roach? Cockroach?? Try CockROACHES!! About thirty. Oh, that still makes me weak. I'll have to tell that story later, after my dad has passed on. I still have a bit of anger left in me about that and don't want to say anything to jeopardize my inheritance. (wink wink)

Thermos to school during water rationing.
Yeah, on Okinawa we had a drought one year. It was awful. We had to bring our own drinking water from home and there was never any way to bring enough. It was so hot and the fountains were turned off. Not only that but we only had running water at home for a couple days a week. We took showers using only about 2 quarts of water. (I'm not kidding. You washed only the vital parts.) We saved the laundry water in the big deep sink in the utility room and used it to manually flush the toilets on days the water wasn't on. I remember missing the toilet a couple of times and having to mop the floor and try again.

Playing super spy at airport trying to find out why we couldn't get to the Philippines.
This is another one that I need explanation on. I know we always flew standby on MAC charters so I must have been looking at the boarding priority list to see who got on ahead of us and why.

Cutting the wire on Doug's little radio cause you didn't like it.
Doug, my brother, is lucky I didn't cut his throat in his sleep. He made life a living hell for me when I was little. Hell, I was little for YEARS since he was nine years older than me. We shared a bedroom when we lived in Alaska. His little transistor radio kept me awake at night. Or maybe I was jealous because I didn't have one. Anyway, I decided to clip a wire when he wasn't home to solve the issue. But I think I got concerned that it might still work so I clipped every wire inside the thing without thinking that I would be caught. I think that frightened Doug a little bit because, as we now know, scissors lead to knives which lead to .... However, I never hurt him. Even years later when we went out with rifles for some target practice it never occured to me to get back at him. I really only wanted to earn his respect. And I did. He put the target dead center with the fence post and when I hit the "bullseye" I basically blew the fence post into two pieces. Oops!

Eating dog (probably) in Japan.
Okay, now that's a strong accusation. I don't remember exactly what she's talking about here but we did get some rather mysterious meat in the restaurants. You couldn't count on the plastic replicas in their windows to taste like how it looked.

Leaving camera in restaurant in Honolulu and getting it back when we returned from the Arizona Memorial.
Talk about shitting bricks. I bluffed my way through the whole memorial tour and then had to ask meekly if we could go back to the restaurant where we had had breakfast. Luckily, it was there. They held it for me. What can I say? It wasn't 2006, it was 1972!

Bringing the crowd to tears when you sang 'I Am A Child of God" in (our church service)in Alaska.
I had dimples, could carry a tune and humbly believed in what I was singing. I vaguely remember singing in front of everyone and I know I wasn't nervous. Then a few years later my family tormented me by telling me I had to sing "Two Little Ducks" at a family reunion in Utah. (Simple Life-esque) What a dumb follow-up to "I Am A Child of God!"

Screaming your head off when Dr. Gubler tried to take your T-shirt off to examine you. You wouldn't remember that.
I do remember that. How old was I, three? Four? But I thought it happened in Alaska after witnessing Doug play a game of basketball where one team had to play shirtless. ("Skins and Shirts") Maybe I thought I was going to be forced to play basketball. Maybe I was just modest! Maybe I didn't want to be stripped by a stranger! Whatever!

The kid in the bed next to you when you had your tonsils out that went blue and, if we hadn't been there to yell for help, probably would have died. Guess you don't remember that either.
No, but I remember the newborn baby that was in the same room (there were a lot of us lined up in that room) that cried nonstop. And I remember you coming in to change my diaper and how ashamed I was of that, plastic pants, diaper rash and all. I was a serious bedwetter. It went on for waaaay too long. At least now there's an explanation. Okay, TOO MUCH INFORMATION!

Getting conned into picking berries in Alaska. Not just Alaska but everywhere we lived. Even in Utah on my birthday once I got tricked and manipulated into going up Middle Canyon to pick those damn awful chokecherries. I remember the steep canyon walls, those scrubby bushes and thinking that I'd just rather plunge to my death than have to keep picking those nasty little berries. Of course, years later, I look back fondly at it all.

It was/is Mother's passion, one of them, and I never got hurt. Raspberries, blueberries, chokecherries, gooseberries, blackberries; we had to pick berries wherever we found them. We had to go out in search for them. I'm glad we never had to go picking cranberries because I would have drowned.

Forgetting to take a belt when we went to Hong Kong. (Didn't know) what to do when had to go to that cocktail party or whatever it was!
I was thirteen years old. What did I know about packing? I also forgot pajamas when we went to the Philippines. You should see me now when it's time to travel. I absolutely go into a panic. And I dream about leaving on a trip but forgetting my passport or tickets. I have a lot of travel anxiety dreams. Actually, I have a lot of basic anxiety dreams. But I digress. I'm sure my travel stress dreams are due now, mostly, because of my stressful airline career. It was a wild 15-year ride that pretty much ended on 9/11.


So that's the quick and dirty version of all those topics. Keep 'em coming, Mom, because that was fun.

09 April 2006

"So..she's snacking?"

When is a job more than just a job? In my experience it's when you have to go home afterwards and do some research on the Internet about something you've never heard of or seen before.

The date is unimportant. The tour group that day was two cartloads of senior women from an assisted living facility. That's not important either except that I'm grateful for the way they reacted to what we saw. We could have just as easily had a rowdy group of grade school children or some nasty teens.

Perhaps this would be a good time to see the video if you haven't already skipped ahead. This is a very short video accompanied by music; my second effort. Enjoy, please, but not at mealtime.
Click here when ready.

I'm so glad I had my video camera with me that day. And in a way I'm glad the elephant wasn't satisfied with his first trip up the bum because I caught the second one on tape. We were all still stunned from the first time. It was a very awkward moment and will occupy a high position on my list of docentia experiences. During the second helping (the one caught on tape) the only background noise is someone asking, "So she's snacking, is that what's happening?"

Up until then, the only time I'd ever witnessed this before was one very cold winter morning many years ago. My grandmother's next door neighbors' German Shepherds were outside running around in the snow. Then one of them stopped and dropped a hot, steaming dump and to my utter amazement, the other one came over and ate it. I don't think anybody believed my story, with the exception of a psychologist or two.

Back to the day of the video, after getting home from the zoo I went online and started looking into it. I discovered that it has a name: coprophagia. And although disgusting, it's not terribly uncommon. I haven't done enough research to write a paper on the subject. I haven't even done enough research to write an article for our zoo newsletter even though I'd love to interview some of the keepers from various zoos to see what they're doing to discourage it, if that's their strategy. Don't get the wrong idea. The elephants are NOT deprived of food or nutrients.

First Prize for the most revolting comment from among the witnesses that day goes to the guy that said his dogs eat the cat turds right out of the box which saves him from doing maintenance. Now that's just sickening.

So, enough about this. It's just one of my absolute best captures on video but highly unlikely to win any money from America's Funniest Home Videos. World, it's all yours. Enjoy.

06 April 2006

When Friends Die Young

I guess you know you're an adult when you keep up with the obituary section in your home-town newspaper. It's always such a shock to read that someone your own age has died, whatever the cause. Even at 47 it seems so strange to be outliving my friends.

Fortunately my attitude about so-called "death" is healthy because of my religious upbringing. It's sad, of course, but not the end of life (except the temporary separation of body and spirit) and we'll eventually all catch up. I don't know how people can cope without this foundation.

Again, just recently, another friend has passed on. We were very good friends in high school and she was someone my mom thought would make a good wife. (hint hint) My mother didn't make a comment like that about any other girl I know. I have no doubt that she was a good wife and mother. She was perfect in so many way and delightfully silly too. I've never tasted a cookie that was as good as her "Gockneys." They were huge, white sugar cookies and I've thought about them frequently for 30 years.

We called her "Crazy Jilly" and she lived up to her nickname in purely entertaining ways and with grace and style. She loved the camaraderie and attention. I have a photo that brings back all those wonderful memories. http://www.flickr.com/photos/the_worm_turns/67535128/in/set-1426515/

She was delightful.

I know that those who love her, particularly her family and neighbors, must be feeling a deep sense of loss. She reportedly battled cancer and so while I'm sure she is glad to be free from her pain and discomfort, I'm certain that she's lovingly watching over you.

I think I understand grief now. It's personal and egocentric. It's about "my" loss. And I'm discovering why I tend to keep myself detached from others. Sometimes the loss has been too great, singularly and collectively. Since I haven't seen Jill in over 25 years I can't say that I'm grieving. But my soul wants to reach out to the people who love her, share their grief if it's possible, and help lighten their burden.

My thoughts also turn to Brian, Tom, Eric C., Ted, Kile, Coral, Mark, Annie, Robert, Richard, Leticia, Eric W. (who took his own life) and so many others including my cat, Orlock. Life is short, looking back. But looking ahead it can seem painfully long. If they could come back and tell us all about what's next, it seems to me that would render our existence rather useless.

I guess that's about all we need to know. It's "The Long Way Home." This is what the journey is all about.

Resign NOW


"To: George Bush,
Due to the recent revelations by disgraced aide to Dick Cheney, L. "Scooter" Libby, that George Bush authorized the leak of CIA Valerie Plame's name to reporters, thus by compromising her safety, the safety of many Americans working undercover and reinforcing the lie that Saddam had WMD, the leadership and members of Gold Star Families for Peace call for the resignation of George Bush and Dick Cheney.

We have paid dearly and permanently for the lies of this administration. The "yellow cake uranium" lie was a lie of historic and nefarious proportions that led to the deaths of our loved ones in Iraq and the devastation of an innocent country and the deaths of tens of thousands of innocent citizens of Iraq.

George Bush said that the person who leaked the information would be "dealt with," and Scotty McClellan reiterated this position at a later press conference.

So, George, considering that this is just one of the many lies you told to justify the illegal and immoral occupation of iraq, the members of GSFP are calling on you to finally do the honorable thing and deal with yourself and resign and we also call for the resignation of anyone else in your administration who lied to America, our families, and the world about the reasons for killing our dear loved ones.

Our respect and best wishes also go out to the Plame/Wilson family for what they have also endured for doing the right thing to try and expose the lies to stop this regime's headlong rush to disaster in Iraq and by the attacks on their family by our own government.

Signed:The Needlessly Devastated Families of Gold Star Families for Peace

04 April 2006

You're The Top



Where have I been lately? Right here with my face in the computer working on something creative. Check this out:
http://www.vimeo.com/clip=60082
It's part of a larger project that was a birthday present-ation to a friend. Slide shows w/music are fun but now that I own the proper cable, have hours and hours of video, watch out for some new types of entertainment!